Friday, October 28, 2005

Prezidentin’ Is Hard Work

Here’s the transcript of President G.W. Beard’s (see previous post for facial hair reference) remarks on the resignation of Scooter Libby.

Now here’s the translation:

It’s hard goddamn work being the President. And I ain’t got time to be talkin’ up here about indictments and what not. I gotta a job to do. And it’s hard work. The only thing Scooter did wrong was get caught. So I’m gonna look you media fellas in the eyes and tell you he’s a good guy who worked hard - just like me. It’s hard work.

Then I’m gonna tell you that we got a system here. And it says you’re innocent until proven guilty. Then I’m gonna laugh out loud as I think of all those Ay-rabs down in Gitmo who will never get a trial. It’s hard work being so funny.

Then, before I go, I’m gonna tell you what to report on instead of this scandal. I’m protecting the American people. I’m getting the economy moving. And I am going to name somebody to the Supreme Court. And if that don’t work, my next stunt will be jumping the Snake River Canyon in a rocket.

Thank you very much.

What he didn’t say was breaking the law would not be tolerated in his White House. I guess he’s already got enough to worry about, with the hard work and all.

No comments: