Monday, December 19, 2005

Western Music Banned in Iran

How that played out inside the White House:

Advisor: President Bush, we have received intelligence that the president of Iran has banned all Western music in his country.

Bush: What? No Toby Keith? Fire up the smart bombs!

Advisor: No, sir. Not country western music, all music from the countries west of Iran.

Bush:
The music of Kanye West? Good. I hate that punk. Saying I don’t care about black people. I have black friends! You can call me what ever you want, but don’t call me a racist. And don’t call me late for dinner.

[LAUGHTER]

Advisor:
No, sir. The president of Iran did not ban the music of Kanye West. Well, actually, he did, because he banned ALL MUSIC COMING FROM THE WEST, including the United States.

Bush: We can’t have that. How are Middle Easterners gonna learn how to live under Democracy?

Advisor: Uhh... Should we send the president a message?

Bush:
Yeah, that’s a good idea. Start off with: “We can’t have that. How are Middle Easterners gonna learn how to live under Democracy?”

Advisor: I’ll tell you what, sir. I’ll go let Mr. Rove know about this and let you get back to sleep.

Bush: Okay. But end the message with some Toby Keith, like: “And you'll be sorry that you messed with/The U.S. of A./'Cause we'll put a boot in your ass/It's the American way.” Yeah, I like that.

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